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| Samuel Mekhi Meaning: God Heard and voice of the Lord |
A women who has given birth, A flower budding after a hard grey winter, a child running and jumping after being deathly ill... Can any of these moments mean as much as they do without the pain, hardship and uncomfortable birthing process? I can tell you from experience that the answer is NO!
After birthing my son, experiencing the most physical pain of my life never mind the emotional and mental I have never cared quite so much for a tiny person as I do this baby. He is the "when beauty happens" moment.
Even before this... I had several miscarriages. The emotional pain can't even truly be expressed on paper but if I could sum it up in a sentence or few this is what it would read: Miscarriage... A heart wrenching sadness followed by empty arms and an ever pondering mind with the question WHY? Those were my babies! Little ones with heart beats and possible foot prints... They were dreamed about, planned for and their little faces were imagined. How can you not? After all, the Lord was doing something amazing... a little PERSON was being formed! I still can't explain the whys or even the hurts away but I can say that my heart has been softened. Each day of my pregnancy with Samuel I praised God for that one more day of being my little ones Mama! I have loved my son all the more because of what I lost. I also have taken less days for granite... each day with Samuel is a gift from God and I have been more keen to see them that way. My cup runs over with a joy brought on through pain and suffering. We cannot truly experience that unshakable kind of joy without it. So with that in mind I thank the Lord for the "when beauty happens" moment but even more I thank Him for giving me the gift to see the beauty in the making. The process before the moment of "hurray!" The potential of the rainbow before the storm is over.
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